No, honestly!

Heard the one about the Aber alumnus who lost his wallet?
 
An energetic Aberite was on a walking holiday in Yorkshire, three hundred miles from home, when he discovered he had lost his wallet somewhere on the wild and woolly Moors.  Frantic, he backtracked as best he could to look for it.
 
In the meantime, a decent citizen was wandering the same landscape and came across the wallet.  Inside, he found nothing to identify the address of the owner, just an Aber Uni credit card.  Being a resourceful chap, he rang the University switchboard who took a note of the name and number and passed it on to the Development & Alumni Relations department.    A quick look on the database evinced a home phone number, where an answerphone message provided the gentleman’s mobile number.
 
Thus it was that, still searching for his wallet amongst the tussocks and bracken, the Aber alumnus received a call on his mobile from his old University:  “Do you happen to have lost your wallet?”
 
Within an hour the good Samaritan and the lucky Aberite had met up where the wallet was exchanged for some heartfelt thanks.  Asked to comment upon the story, the alumni relations team member responsible merely replied: “It’s all part of the service.”